Wednesday 2 March 2011

Reconciliation

Reconciliation. What a sweet word that is. My first memory of it, as THE word to describe a radical coming together and forgiveness, was in the context of the South African experience. I hope my use of the word offends no one, as I know this situation does not approach the years of suffering and lack of hope of Apartheid, yet what happened in our marina is a much milder form of that same human condition of separation and judgement.  And the resolution of our little problem here also comes under the heading of small miracle.
Yesterday I was feeling badly that I had exposed what was going on at the marina, as though I was telling tales out of school. I was incensed over the whole thing and also I felt it was a part of my experience here and I didn’t want to gloss over it. Well, ironically,perhaps my expression of my feelings in this blog gave me some permission to talk more freely about it with others and not to adhere to my usual northern European reticence about discussing such things (idle gossip, you know). At lunch I brought it up with a marina resident not directly involved and got his take on it.  He gave me a little piece of the history that I personally had not understood. He also told me that things were starting to settle down a little bit. And I tentatively suggested to him that maybe the marina residents group just needed to get a little rebellion out of their system and were now ready to just go with the flow of the rules. He thought so. And then I dipped my toe in the water of “what if?” What if the Dockmaster talked with the couple that had been ordered to leave (and who were now starting to leash their dog) and felt out the possibility of reaching a new understanding- a recognition of this experience as a mutual learning and a first time of enforcing the rules. Perhaps then there could be apologies all around and the page could be turned back (let’s rescind the order to leave) and ahead to “we all have figured out that we value what we have here and we want to make it work.”  Hmmm, he said, and nodded.
Anyway, I ran into the Dockmaster 2 minutes later and asked if that might be a possibility. And he smiled and said he really would like to do something like that.
The next I heard about it was later in the evening. We were at dinner at the beach and this couple was there. They were all happy – and apparently that’s what happened. The Dockmaster is no longer perceived as evil incarnate-- in fact has started some real friendships--and everyone gets it that the rules are for real. Each of us had our own little part in making it happen. I think the thing had run its course, there was a softening and opening, and everyone helped each other get the last little way. Who could ask for a better miracle?

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